Helping Families Thrive In Life
The One Major Relational Tool In Your Homeschooling Arsenal.
Are you still feeling that nagging pressure to connect with your child as their parent/teacher?
Sure, every parent struggles to find the sweet spot to connect with their children – especially when you’re the parent as well as the teacher – all day, every day.
Working hard to educate, disciple, train, and help them develop a Christ-like character is a lot of work – sometimes hard work. But it doesn’t have to be difficult or stressful work. It can actually be enjoyable.
In our 20 plus years of homeschooling our children, we’ve met countless homeschooling parents that struggle with the same issues most people do – except those struggles seem more intense because you’re with your child 24-7, not just early in the morning and later at night.
As parents, our position isn't to perform and provide amazing students in our homes and in society. Certainly, teaching is crucial component of our role, but we teach most effectively if we connect with our children in a meaningful way so they really get what we're trying to teach them.
When we were young parents, my wife and I read tons of books and went to meaningful and powerful homeschool conferences to help us in this new endeavor/calling. We felt it was also important to learn to connect with our kids more than anything. Practically, that's to have them mind us, obey, respect and do what they must as students and as our own children.
In order to connect with them we needed to learn to develop the ability to have their hearts, not just their obedience.
Quickly (and thankfully) we learned that in order to do this we needed to have one major relational tool in our homeschooling arsenal. We needed to practice and teach them mutual respect.
In order to connect with our kids we need to learn to develop the ability to have their hearts, not just their head. Click to Tweet
We all know what respect is. Sometimes I think we need to define that what it really is. But for the sake of keeping this article in perspective and not necessarily "politically correct" let me give you the definition of "respect."
According to dictionary.com, respect is: “esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability”
As young leaders in our church at the time we were focused on vision, goal setting and much implementation in order to accomplish God's plan of action for our respective positions.
Having this as our daily mindset could get us to implement the same idea in our home, that of providing vision, goal setting and producing results.
Not a bad deal for a home.
The problem is that often times we make our children help us fulfill our vision as parents, leaders, ministers, or anything in life. We found that the focus was not implementing our vision and having our kids help us attain our vision. Truth is -they - our kids - ARE the vision.
Everything we do is about their faith, their growth, their development, both academically and spiritually, in knowing, loving, and serving God.
Truth is we earn their respect by demonstrating a Christ like character and giving them individual respect regarding their likes and dislikes, ways of thinking and learning abilities even when they're in a bad mood but without excusing any bad or negative behavior.
In this way, they also learn that respect must be mutual and not just one-sided.
Being their parents as well as their daily teacher is both a privilege as well as challenge. Yet, with God's help we can help them become individuals who will be admired by others by the genuine character they possess. This big result starts with a simple act of respect towards them; conversely, earning their respect – not just demanding it.
If you want to have your child’s heart and not just their head, then you’d want to demonstrate an intentional respect that will help you connect with them in deep relational ways. They will want to be true to their word, your demands of behavior even when you’re not around.
This is one big reward of being a homeschool parent that does not need to be stressful, yet not without hard and consistent work.
For more information on understanding our children you can enjoy materials from my friend Dr. Jolene Enlarcher. She writes extensively about millennials which is much of our children’s generation.
Also, my friend Norm Wakefield has excellent materials on learning how to obtain our child’s heart as well as being a consistent parent to your homeschooled child.
Lastly, to help you lead your family with purpose and vision, you can download my FREE video 4 Simple Steps To Lead Your Family With Vision. This course comes with a downloadable pdf guide, to help you in your daily walk with leading your family with vision.
Alex & Deborah Colόn
Learn The 4 Simple Steps To Lead Your
Family With Vision.
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by Alex Colón
This book is about the development that takes place in your life while pursuing the life God has designed for you. This book will clarify the mysteries of your vision pursuit.